Plastic Perfect

Keeping with this celebrity theme...cats love disecting celebrity...

How is it that Demi Moore is the only human being who looks amazing after plastic surgery? Everyone else--even young starlets with only lip injections--looks like creatures from the deep.

We're stumped by this one. That woman looks hot...meeeoooww!

The Entire Animal Kingdom Is Suffering

Why is Brody Jenner on so many God damn reality shows? Drop it with him already! Even we are fed up with it...and we're cats!

I Keep Them Guessing

"Come on...you had to know the day would come when one of us would sit on the only piece of furniture we haven't covered in fur! I guess you'll just have to find a new seat for your allergic friends. Suckers..."

Queen Creepy Is In The House

"So what if my fur is grey and all these blankets are white? I'm sitting here! Why do we have all white blankets anyway? Seems like YOU'RE the one setting yourself up for disappointment with all these white blanket purchases! That's about as smart as buying property in a hurricane zone, don't you think? I HAVE GREY FUR! Look, I didn't want to mention this but the floor rug is a version of white as well. I HAVE GREY FUR! Work with me people!"

Cats Do Watch TV...We'll Prove It Right Now.

"This is the fourth day in a row they've been watching that darn war thingy on TV. Enough already! BORING. At least throw some wadded up paper around for me to attack."








"Oh, Creepy, it's the Ken Burns epic 'The War' on PBS! It's hours upon hours of footage and commentary on World War 2. Absolutely fascinating and consuming and heartbreaking...I mean, the whole part on that American family held captive by the Japanese in the Philippines and then being attacked as the US soldiers were freeing them...uh, I have laid awake at night wondering what I may have done in that same situation. Would the troops have come to my rescue as well? Would we have won without Patton?"






"You've been hitting the catnip pretty hard, haven't you?"










"Hell yes I have, did you watch any of this program?! That shit was crazy!!! Not all of us have the luxury of being prescribed Prozac like you, Creepy. We all must find a way to cope with reality and tragedy."






"Fine, fine, point taken. I just wish there were more episodes of 'Rock of Love.' Now that shit was crazy! Suck it Lacey! And if we're talking tragedy, did you SEE what Heather's hair was like on the reunion? Good god woman!"






"I'm going to pretend this is another way you cope, Creepy."

What Fuzz Dreams About While Sleeping In A Pink Donut

"Don't cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me, don't cha wish your girlfriend was a freak like me..." Goodness, that song is catchy!

Fatty and Creepy Aren't Ones To Follow Deadlines

We grew bored of technology for a few weeks.

We'll post after this evening's nap.

Well...perhaps after the second evening nap. Let's play it by ear, shall we?!

Fluff AND Fuzz Weigh In

FLUFF: Fuzz, did you hear? NFL football player Michael Vick has pleaded guilty to dogfighting!

FUZZ: I can't believe someone who loves to play ball as much as us could be capable of such cruelty!

FLUFF: I know, where's our $130 million contract?! We're the REAL pro ball players! Hey, does my bow still look okay?

Cats Follow Politics Too

Fatty: U.S. Attorney General Alberto Gonzales resigned from his post today.

Creepy: Who?

Fatty: Exactly.

Addict

CREEPY: Why did she buy cheese-free pizza only to put cheese on it herself?! Even I know that doesn't make much sense!

FATTY: Poor girl...she's convinced cheese is bad for her but can't stop eating it. Earlier I caught her staring at a block of cheddar and silently whimpering. I'm worried she may do something drastic.

CREEPY: Like what...kill herself over cheese?! Please don't tell me it's going to be as drastic as "The Great Diet Coke Weening of 2006." That was brutal on us all!!!

Pop Culture 101 From Dinosaur

Stanley: Hey Dinosaur...would you like to help me with my Friendster page? I'd like to make some friends! Yeah, new friends!

Dinosaur: Squeaka squeaka.

Stanley: What do you mean Friendster is passe?

Dinosaur: Squeaka squeaka.

Stanley: I've never heard of Myspace or Facebook. If I join those sites can I make friends? I want to make friends!

Dinosaur: Squeaka squeaka.

Stanley: But I'm not in a band or sketch comedy troupe that I need to promote. I just want to meet friends! Yippee, friends!

Dinosaur: Squeaka squeaka.

Stanley: I've only searched for apartments on Craigslist. I can meet friends there? Woo hoo, friends!

Dinosaur: Squeaka squeaka.

Stanley: I have no idea if I'm a T4M or M4TWF! I just want to make friends!!! Isn't that what the Internet is all about? Connecting with others all over the world? Creating networks that would otherwise not exist? What is the point of the Internet if I can't use it to make friends?

Dinosaur: Squeaka squeaka.

Stanley: I ADORE shopping at L.L. Bean! Goodness, I'm in desperate need of a monogrammed tote and slippers! Yeah, new tote and slippers!!! That's even better than making new friends!!! Thank you, Dinosaur!!!

Dinosaur: Squeaka squeaka.

Stanley: Hey, Dinosaur?

Dinosaur: Squeak?

Stanley: I love you!

Dinosaur: Squeaka, squeaka you too, Stanley.

Bird Games

CREEPY: Did you see how our owner and the neighbor nursed that baby bird back to health yesterday between storms? I am utterly disgusted.

FATTY: Oh, I think that was precious! I only wish they had brought the little fellow up here to "play" after his health was restored. I used to "play" with birds all the time back in my alley cat/homeless days.

CREEPY: Play?! I have asked you REPEATEDLY to play Scattergories with me! What's a baby bird got that I don't?! Not fair!

Snore....

We will post when we feel like it.

Right now we must sleep.

We are tired from sleeping all night.